Roundtable: Very Specific Predictions for FCC vs New England
May 29, 2021
The Post Staff
The Post's crack team of writers looked into their crystal balls to figure out what exactly is going to happen in today's match between FC Cincinnati and New England Revolution in FC Cincinnati's Match Week 6.
FCC’s winning streak ends at a season high of one after a 2-1 defeat to the Revs. A respectable result against the top team in the East, but the #JaapOut crowd rejoices after another nail is driven into the coffin. I see FCC dropping back into their boring, yet effective, five-back system and absorbing pressure for a majority of the game. In a similar style to their comeback victory last week against Montreal, FCC will break their defensive shell once they find themselves behind and bag one against a Revolution defense that has been susceptible so far this season. Cameron will be a one man brick wall at times, Acosta will have creative moments that put an optimistic smile across my face, Brenner will score 2 fantasy points, Stam’s job security will be under fire again, and I will drown my sorrows in a 3-way and a Kona Big Wave.
The broadcast will make a point of showing Cameron and Arena smiling/talking/shaking hands. People love a squashed beef and neither of them is dumb enough to not be “fake nice” for the cameras. There’s a non-zero chance they yell at each other during the game, however.”
THE.. FC, are going to lose 3-1 and the continued suffering of a Cincinnati sports fan will continue. Tom Bogart will take a deserved but ill-received swipe at The FC promoting one of the handful of FC fans that have the will to retort will do so, promoting a number of self hating fans to say something along the lines of, “yeah but we deserve it”. Bogart will use his trap card “Coy”, and Jeff Reuter will ask “why must they be this way?”, but he knows why we must be this way. Despite this being the second home match, FC fans will be perplexed as to why matchday proceedings are imperfect.
FC Cincinnati will win 2-0. Run of play goals from Brenner and Yuya Kubo will have fans believing anything is possible. Stam’s hot seat officially goes ice cold as Kevin Wallace scrambles to avoid crediting our fair Jaap. The shocking twist? Kevin is correct. In a true USL flashback, the two individual goals will have papered over stilted play and suspect positioning. FC wins a huge game in spite of the coach, but the glory will belong to us all.
FC Cincinnati wins 4-1 after a Brenner and Acosta brace embarrass the Gil & Bou show New England brings to TQL Stadium. It is a tactical masterclass from Jaap Stam that goes back to the 4-3-3 now that every player is healthy. FCC out-passes, out-paces, and completely out-plays New England. The only goal conceded is scored on Tyton (who has ro sub in for Vermeer after a heroic diving tackle injures him, but not long-term) when he gives up an easy goal to a looping Teal Bunbury half-shot that could have been saved by Cody Cropper. At the final whistle it's clear Stam has completely mastered this roster and the roster has mastered his tactical plan. FC Cincinnati looks like a force to be reckoned with after the international break and the league takes the Orange and Blue seriously. That ought to cover all my bases.