FC Cincinnati look to create Real Salt Lake’s Spooky Mormon Hell Dream
Damon Gumbert
Disclaimer: There will be “The Book of Mormon” references in this article because I know nothing about Mormonism except what South Park creators Trey Stone and Matt Parker have taught me.
FC Cincinnati are feeling more confident heading into their match with Real Salt Lake than they were going into their battle with Miami on Wednesday. Before Wednesday, the team was still recovering from a horrific fumble against Columbus that saw a 2-0 lead turn into a 4-2 loss. All of the players who spoke after the match said the same thing, this is a wake up call. Well consider the team awake, because after a 3-0 win over Lionel Messi and Inter Miami, the vibes could not be higher.
“Typically, wins and losses and good performance and bad performance can bring out the obvious emotions,” Head Coach Pat Noonan said in his pre-match presser on Friday. “But there was disappointment after the weekend, and the guys are in a better place because.of how they improved and how they approached the Miami game to have a better performance and a better outcome.”
The players will now turn their attention to a surging Real Salt Lake, a team who hasn’t lost since a 2-0 drubbing from LA Galaxy on May 31.
You and Me (But Mostly Diego Luna)
RSL has had a bit of an up and down year so far, starting the season with a 4-0 loss to the San Jose Earthquakes and getting bounced from the CONCACAF Champions Cup by Costa Rican side C.S. Herediano, but have recently come alive, winning four and drawing once in their last five matchups.
Diego Luna, who has emerged as a star for the US Men’s National Team, has led the team into striking distance of a Western Conference playoff spot. The Disney+ RSL star midfielder leads the team in goals (8) and assists (4).
The next closest goal scorer on RSL is Diogo Goncalves, who is rocking a stout three goals this season. To say that the offense is being carried by Luna seems to be an understatement.
“I think he’s got a good feel for movement off the ball to find space for himself,” Noonan said of Luna. “I think he sees pressure in a good way, to be able to combine with his teammates, and moves off the ball in those moments really well to free himself up. Good dribbler, can beat you with shots from distance, can beat you on the dribble, very active and very effective. And you know, at a young age, you can see a player that is hungry and has improved a great deal in a short amount of time.”
Sal Tlay Ka Siti
While RSL’s offense has been lacking a big scorer outside of Luna, their defense has made itself known. RSL has given up the 8th fewest amount of goals in all of MLS this season, with only 28 goals allowed.
That is less than Columbus, San Diego, Miami, and Cincinnati, who all have 10+ points more than RSL in the standings.
Salt Lake’s defense has proved to be aggressive, placing themselves in the top 10 most fouls committed so far this season. The hard part for RSL will be keeping their guys on the pitch. The club currently has four players who are one yellow card away from a one game suspension, including Luna and defender Brayan Vera.
“If you look at the fouls, they’re an aggressive team, so aggressive, but what I don’t see is reckless,” Noonan said of RSL’s defense. “So maybe you know, because you step to the ball in an aggressive way, there’s going to be more fouls.”
Man Up
Ok, I’m going to stop pretending to know what I’m talking about with Salt Lake and focus on Cincinnati. With Kevin Denkey picking up an injury in the Columbus game and, according to Pat Noonan, likely to miss some extended time, it’s time for a new starting striker to step up. Noonan has favored playing Kei Kamara up top, seemingly a locked on starter now, but with Denkey out it is still a question of who will be starting next to him.
Dado Valenzuela started and scored on Wednesday against Miami, but has seemingly still not locked in a starting position on the team. “I don’t think the conversations around Dado have changed too much as far as what we’re seeing, what he’s capable of,” Noonan said in his presser. “You know, with the ball I think it’s always around consistency with young players and in games and being able to play in different types of games, you know, against a physical team, against a team that sits back, you know, I think that’s where the improvement can be for Dado is just being able to adapt to different opponents and different structures to understand how to impact the game.”
Valenzuela has received a lot of backing from the fan base recently, especially from members of the Cincy PostCast, and there has been some confustion on why Noonan doesn’t always play him.
Dado currently sits in third place on the team in goals (5) behind Evander (15) and Denkey (12). He has accomplished this while only playing 581 minutes so far this season. The 20-year-old has played less minutes and scored more goals than Yuya Kubo, Sergio Santos, Luca Orellano, and Pavel Bucha. If you add the goals from all four of those players together, they only equal the goals that Dado has scored himself this season.
The Boca Raton native also has the fourth highest Shots on Target (SoT) and expected goals (xG) on the team and has drawn the sixth most fouls, all while playing under 600 minutes on the season. While the homegrown product may not have all of the physical attributes that his teammates do, it is undeniable that he is having a very productive season thus far and it should be difficult to not find playing time for him going forward.
Encore
With the team coming off a big win over Inter Miami, most fans are hoping for more of the same in Salt Lake. Unfortunately, the odds are against Cincinnati winning this matchup.
In the two previous seasons that The Cincy PostCast has traveled for an away game, the team has lost both times. In 2023, it was Hell is Real in Columbus. In 2024 it was a matchup against the New York Red Bulls. If the team is unable to walk out of Utah with a victory, the PostCast should be banned from leaving the state of Ohio.
That being said, if superstitions are not your thing, then FC Cincinnati has a good chance to pick up three points. The defense has looked strong this season, save for the Columbus, Atlanta, and Philadephia massacres. Nick Hagglund has returned to the team, making the defense it’s healthiest it’s been in months.
While the offense has a few question marks, it still has Evander. The Brazilian has scored in five straight matches, an FC Cincinnati record, including a brace on Wednesday against Inter Miami. If they defense is able to shut down the middling Real Salt Lake offense, another Evander goal could be all the team needs to pick up three points.
We’ll see if they’re able to do it when they travel to Utah and Salt Lake City Saturday. The match kicks off at 9:30 p.m. e.t./ 7:30 mountain. You can view the match on AppleTV+ with an MLS Season Pass subscription or at any one of the clubs participating Pub Partners, including Streetside Brewery.
