How to Fix FC Cincinnati’s Defense

SHAWN BEHMER

I’ll just go ahead and say it: Chris Albright has his work cut out for him ahead of the summer transfer window which opens Monday, July 13 through Wednesday, September 2..

From addressing the aging talent to the overvaluation of certain defenders on this roster, a lot needs to happen to get this team back to the standard we are familiar with. Our defensive play is simply not sustainable and other teams will only get better during the break.

Before we get into what can be done, let’s quickly look at this FC Cincinnati defense.

After the 6-2 thrashing of Orlando City SC, FC Cincinnati have closed out the first half of MLS play with 37 goals conceded – the second-most in MLS.

With a whopping 2.5 goals conceded per match, The FC is on pace to concede 85 goals by the end of the MLS season. To paint a picture, FC Cincinnati’s historically terrible 2019 team conceded 75 goals, which broke the record for most goals conceded. It wasn’t until San Jose said, “Hold my beer,” in 2024 that the record was broken again with 76 goals conceded.

So what’s the problem this year? On paper, this team should not be compared to the historically bad FC teams.

Well, chat, this is what happens when you are decimated by injuries, overpaying talent and using critical roster designations on said players. 

What could The FC possibly do this summer to overcome these challenges? Fear not, for I have a solution.

Replacing the Entire Defense with Matts

Yes. Replacing the entire defense with Matts will allow us, as a fanbase, to cope with the fact that Matt Miazga will one day part ways with The FC. 

Just imagine the scenes if Matt Miazga is given a role on Noonan’s staff and Matt gets to lead his Matt subordinates from the sideline. Now that would be electric. This would allow us to deploy a new-look defense while the spirit of Matt Miazga will live on through the new Matts.

Now let’s take a look at all the Matts I would love to see at The FC.

Goalkeeper Matt

GK: Matvey Safonov of PSG. 

There’s no denying that Matt is a great goalkeeper. What sticks out to me is that, at age 12, he competed in the Mathematical Kangaroo, a global math competition. So that’s cool. He would obviously get along well with current FC player and accountant, Kyle Smith.

Center back Matts

Right CB: Matte Smets of Genk

Matt began his career as a CDM but was thrusted into a CB role. Sound familiar?

CB: Matthijs de Ligt of Manchester United

Matt could easily be our Designated Player center back.

Left CB: Matteo Ruggeri of Atletico Madrid

Matt plays LB but has played LCB in a back-three. Also sound familiar?

Wingback Matts

LWB: Matty Cash of Aston Villa

This name rules.

RWB: Matt Doherty of Wolverhampton

This Matt played with Yerson Mosquera at Wolves. If we are lucky, maybe Yerson can do some recruiting to get Matt to The FC.

Defensive Midfield Matts

CDM: Matthew O’Riley of Marseille (loaned from Brighton)

Matt was very successful at Celtic. Not many can say the same.

CDM: Matt Grimes of Coventry City

Last but not least, here’s Matt. I have nothing else to say about him.

the matt lineup

Final Thoughts

Well, there you have it. That’s your FC defense made up entirely of Matts. This roster would not only elevate the defense, it would allow us to find solace in the company of other Matts when Miazga inevitably departs The FC.

The 2026 MLS Secondary Transfer Window officially opens on Monday, July 13 and closes on Wednesday, September 2.

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